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i’m discovering that learning after college is a million times more difficult. i find my self struggling to keep up with trying to keep up with the amount of knowledge that is thrown at me. i’m finding that the hardest lesson i’m having to teach myself is to not get frustrated and give up but to take these learnings and apply to improving myself. this isn’t something you learn in school. when you’re in school it’s either you get it or you don’t and you move on. in real life you either get it or you take your failures and setbacks and apply to doing better next time. i come home from work some days and i feel so enthralled and confident in my abilities and then others i come home and i’m feeling like such a failure and so destroyed.

i came home from work today feeling so disappointed in myself and i’m having the hardest time letting go of it. it’s so difficult because they don’t teach this to you in school yet it’s probably one of the most important lessons or at least for me it is. i’m finding it more difficult for me to learn this because i take things very personal and i’m extremely harsh on myself. i feel like i’m struggling and it’s killing me, but i’m trying to work through it. i’m trying my best not to get discouraged.

on the lighter, and less introspective side of things …

it’s 35 degrees outside at the moment and i’m still sorting out my feelings towards this whole actually having a winter concept. i’m hoping i’ll change my tune when i see the first snow. my goal was to get a coat at gap today but of course the store near work was closed, as they were preparing for their launch of their red line of clothing. i need something warm yet not bulky; i can’t stand feeling like a giant marshmallow.

i’ve decided i need to go to new york to see the colbert report taped live.

until later.