lost

i’m at a loss for anything decent to talk about.

my trip to austin was short and stressful. beyond stressful. if i didn’t suck so much at my job i’m sure it would have been better. i just don’t get it. i really don’t. i’m not used to failure so it’s all coming as a bit of a shock. something just isn’t clicking.

beyond work i didn’t do too much while i was there. left work late on tuesday and then grabbed a bite to eat and a mexican martini at trudy’s with my friend brian. the mexican martini was a complete disappointment. i stayed at the stephen f. austin hotel which was quite nice. i had a huge california king bed. so comfortable.

the next evening i had drinks with a few co-workers. it was nice to sit out on the patio and just enjoy a nice drink, or two (or four or five, but who’s counting?). i ended up going to work the next day and all this shit just hit the fan. let’s not even recap that day.

i’m terribly torn between austin and chicago. going back brought a great deal of homesickness. more than anything i just miss the interaction of the austin office. it made me realize just how isolated i’ve become. i sit in my office all day with no interaction beyond my friend megan. then i go home and sit in front of the television all day. at least when i was in austin there were people around to chat with. i actually think i would take a cube over an office. i need the social interaction.

overall, the austin trip was alright. got to meet a lot of new team members and some other people around the agency. plus got to see some friends like blue falcon and all my old friends from when i was an intern. oh those were the good days. after a delayed flight i finally got home around 11pm.

it was a rather uneventful weekend. slightly relaxing although i’ve had a bit of anxiety lately that i haven’t been able to shake.

beyond the nothing i just said, i have nothing else to say. one day i’ll have something good to say.